Ethertech Global Industries (IRL): Super Hot Elite Legitimate Likes
Ethertech Global Industries: Super Hot Elite Legitimate Likes
After existing for years as a platonic ideal, Ethertech Global Industries is formed, with its first department: Super Hot Elite Legitimate Likes. EGISHELL is my company and social media brand - it’s the real company that looks like its not! In a similar vein to Stephen Colbert’s superPAC and John Oliver’s Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption, we seek to make fun of shell companies and tax havens by creating our own! So far as I’m aware, this is all completely in compliance with state and federal laws and is a real company with a real profit motive. I’m seeking to gain enough viewers to make money by posting videos on youtube. To this end, I keep track of my expenses, I keep track of my time, and I maintain compliance with state and federal law by doing my best to make a profit EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR. I have yet to make a profit, but I try - REALLY HARD.
How do I know this is real?
You can see my letter of instantiation here. It’s signed and dated just like a real sole proprietership - because it is a real sole proprietership. The company was formed 2025-04-20 (nice) shortly after I got out of rehab and started getting manna from the Vine.
After this year is over, I’ll also be publishing my timesheets, expenses, and any other necessary information to maintain 1200% legal compliance (that was a typo but I’m leaving it).
Why are you doing this?
I’m really, genuinely trying to make money. I’ve been having employment difficulties during the year of 2025 and a lot of people have said I’m funny, so I’m trying to capitalize on my funny-ness to make money. I don’t think I’d make a good standup comedian, so I’m trying writing and making multimedia. As a completely unwanted side-effect, I can also write off all of my business losses. After I review the products, I dispose of them in a trash fire, because modern corparatism makes no sense and this is the only way I can guarantee that I never accidentally use them for anything personal, which I’m told would result in me having to pay taxes on them. That’s right! The products are kept in existence for the business purpose of using them in order to review them. Once they’re no longer operable, I can finally complete the review of the product’s entire lifecycle! After which, they must be destroyed.
What do you do?
We do unboxing videos, review products from an unnamed supplier, make funny videos. As of 2025-10-17, we also offer FreeBSD support and other computer support services (really!). You can see more about our IT Support services at Ethertech Global Industries: Information Technology Support (EGIITS: pronounced ‘ejits’, no that’s not an insult - but it does kind of sound like one if you watched a lot of Ren & Stimpy!). It’s not a separate company yet, because I’m lazy and poor, so I simply expanded the scope of the company, that way I don’t need to spend the, like $130 it takes to form an LLC (which I don’t have). I have literally no income this year. If it weren’t for my mom, I’d be homeless. This is despite being in the top 1% mentally, which I think is daft - so the next time you’re jealous of someone for being smart, realize that it’s often not rewarded.