Football

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Football

Football

Football

Hike up yer pants and let’s get started!

hiking pants

yes, this is me in my 20s when I was still skinny AF (trying to get back there, but stress weight is no joke). I was ~160 from 16-33 and then ^.

“Jesus Christ, you didn’t warn me that there would be a shirtless attractive man here!” Calm down. Take a couple deep breaths. This is nothing you wouldn’t see at the beach or on the cover of a bodybuilding magazine. I’m still shocked at how The Content Policies freak out when there’s a shirtless guy, hopefully you’re not like that. “I’m straight, I don’t want to see that” If you’re straight it shouldn’t be an issue because it’s not attractive to you, if you’re not, you probably enjoy it, unless you like other body types, which is cool. ANYWAYS…

My experience

My dad was really woo-woo about football, and my brother, who was more burly than me, played. I had already played most sports and was not good at any of them. In addition to not being good, I didn’t like being the worst teammate so I thought I didn’t like sports. As a result, by the time I was in high school I didn’t even try out for football. I don’t think my dad ever asked me if I would be interested, either, but I can’t say for sure.

Dex in FB gear furry me

An attraction

That being said, show me a cute boy in football gear and sproing, my teenage hormones would kick into high gear. This was one of the other issues - I was afraid, not of being hurt physically, but emotionally, if anyone found out that I was absurdly thirsty for anything football. It also left me feeling like “a fraud” - did I really want to play, or did I just want to be near all those cute boys in their football gear, sweating up the locker room? For some reason, perhaps the dualistic thinking promoted by society, I hadn’t considered it might be: both. Something about the sport did appeal to me beyond that - the aggression, being able to run and charge someone and just pound them sounded pretty great for a sometimes angry & aggro, but shy, kid.

I didn’t think I could do it, though. Being around all those other young guys in and out of their uniforms, tackling them and being pressed up against them. I was sure I’d *sproing* one. I didn’t take into consideration that I’d probably be too caught up in the game, or did, but didn’t think it would be enough. I do know my dad tried to get me to “toss around the ‘ol pigskin” and I sucked at throwing, so that was another strike against me.

What I like

  • Mostly sprinting, no long running stretches
  • Physicality/tackling
  • Throwing and catching, but not much.
  • Strategy
  • Being directed as a member of a team
  • Alternately, directing a team (too much pressure)
  • Tight pants
  • Knee socks
  • Jockstraps (why people are wearing these less, IDK, they’re great!)
  • Shoulder Pads! these things look badass as all hell and make you feel like going to war!
  • Jerseys, with flashy colors, silky smooth with block lettering
  • Cleats look cool

Here are some shoe designs me + Lupa came up with:

cleat designs

I bought an entire football uniform because I wanted to see what it would feel like to wear one:

me in a uniform

It feels fantastic, like a second skin, and gets me in the mood to excercize. I feel like I can take on anything and survive. I didn’t realize what I was missing out on. I still think they’re hot AF. I love the layering, too.

2024 - An Extra Layer

I get to play my first tackle football game at the age of 40, thanks to GearBlast, a gay fetish event for sports gear (and other “gear” lovers). Despite it being a gay fetish event, I didn’t get any nookie :-/, but I got to play my first game of tackle football. The sky opened up and I could imagine my dad watching me. It turns out, I fucking love playing football. That I find the uniforms attractive doesn’t take away from the game, it’s just an extra layer that means I love it even more. I had an absolute blast - tackled, got tackled, caught an interception, learned how to throw. It was awesome, I loved it, and I’m trying to find ways to play tackle football now at 41, and there aren’t many. If you know of any in WI, let me know.